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  • Writer's pictureHolly Gee

"Like a Crown, made to be Queen"

Poem Written By: Kadence Barker

Beautiful Words Written from her Mother's perspective: Kristen Barker

Kadence is… well… Kadence. She’s caring, strong willed, a little sassy. She’s a natural leader and most days a force to be reckoned with. I can say that being her mother has been one of the hardest but most rewarding things I’ve ever experienced. Even when I feel like I’ve let her down, hundreds of times over, she just keeps being her, never ceasing to amaze me. Like the day she brought this poem home. I was so proud of her for channeling these feelings and putting them on paper but deeply saddened by the events that led up to her feeling like she needed to do it. The saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me” is nice and all, but really only works in theory. These kids are ruthless to each other. Some of the things said, you can’t help but wonder if these “words” will forever be tattooed in their minds. Reminded every time they look in the mirror, try out for a sport, or take a test. I wish they could see themselves the same way we seen them. It’s hard to see a 9 year old feel so heavily and deeply about something. To know that the day she wrote this, she was picked apart so badly, that she removed herself from the situation and went to write this by herself. Just to block out what was being said. To try not to let their words stick. To remind herself, WHO SHE IS, is absolutely inspiring but also gut wrenching. So, we’re trying to learn some techniques, so that when words are said or the feeling of being excluded, doesn’t hinder her self worth and stops it from spreading to somebody else. We’re learning that:

- Not everyone will like us and we won’t like everyone, but we can be kind about it. We’re not going to beg for a spot at someone else’s table, when we can build our own, however long we need it to be. There’s room for those who wish to have a spot.

- That being confident is not the same as being arrogant, so long as you stay humble & kind.

- That the view in which somebody sees you, is often through a lens of their own insecurities & self worth.

- To try to remember what it felt like when the words or actions of others hurt, so that we may not continue to displace the harm. - Lastly to remember to extend grace, because none of us are “on,” all the time.

I hope she sees that she is more than worthy of love & belonging, no proof required. Actually, my hope is that we all see and come to know that.

“I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb.

Before you were born I set you apart" -Jeremiah 1:5

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